so don't ask if you don't want to know
Posts tagged bitching
Out on the street
Oct 17th
I haven’t really been paying attention around here. I’ve been a bit distracted with stuff.
WHEN THE HELL DID MY APARTMENT COMPLEX BECOME GATED?
I went out tonight and when I got home the entrance I usually enter had the gate closed. I mean sure, there’s been a gate there all along, it’s just never been closed. None of the gates around here have ever been closed. So I slid past and u-turned and went back to the main entrance. Closed. Code box? Don’tcha think you should hand out the fucking codes BEFORE you enable the locked gates? So I whipped around and went to the rear entrance which happened to be open.
Not to mention my A/C has been wanky for days. Finally today they came by to use a garden hose to flush out the brown shit, whatever that was.
Yeah, I’m a little disgrunted.
AND the power cord to this laptop fried out again. It’s only been a couple of months since I bought the last replacement! Poor design. I don’t misuse or twist this thing around. I pretty much stay plugged in in the same spot in my living room except for when I pack it all up and go to Gangplank to record. Last night it started sparking so I went to Fry’s Electronics and bought another cord. Shit.
I told the kids today that December 1st was the cut-off date. Get your shit together by then guys. Mom’s sick and tired of taking care of your asses.
It’s society’s fault!
Sep 15th
One of my new favorite sites is People of WalMart. Seriously, some of these photos could be people out there at any store, but WalMart seems to draw them in. Either that or it just draws in the photographers.
One popped up today:
With this comment underneath:
Parents, STOP THIS! Stop this now! Your kid is not a dog, get him off the leash. I don’t want to hear that you are too busy to watch your child in public. Your priorities are kid first, remembering milk second. Most of the time it’s the kids on leashes that are ignored by their parents the most. But i guess its okay that little Timmy is throwing Oreos at an employee as long as he is doing it while tied to his monkey backpack leash. JUST STOP IT.
(Here’s where I’m gonna piss people off.)
This is society’s fault. The day it became unfashionable and even criminal to smack your kids in public (or at all apparently) you took the power away from the parent and put it the hands of the toddler. At that age there’s no punishment as swift or as understandable to a kid than a swat on the bottom for bad behavior. Time outs and taking away privileges might work great at home but to a little person feeling freedom LOGIC and negotiation will never work. Some kids run off and get into things no matter how closely you watch them or how you try to gently talk them out of it. Those screamers trapped in the cart? That’s your fault. Those brats running around between the racks? Yup, you did that. That boy on a leash? Accept your responsibility.
What can a parent do? I knew that my Mother would slap the shit out of me if I acted like a loose animal in public. She knew HER Mother would do the same. My kids knew I’d drag them out of the store, grasped very tightly by their upper arm, and slap them when we got in the car. Hey, at least I’d get my darling out of the store to stop his annoying other people. THIS man knew that it works, though slapping someone else’s child is never okay. He should have slapped the parent.
Yeah, I know. People shouldn’t take their bratty kids out in public. Right. I said that too before I had kids. Not everyone has the time to perfectly plan every venture out right down to the possible mood of the moment for each child. Sometimes we’re too tired of the battles. Sometimes we have to stop by the store on the way home from the daycare and our little dark angels aren’t at their best. Sometimes you just get dealt that one kid who no matter what won’t behave and you’re reduced to ignoring him hoping to get through your errand without killing him. BECAUSE HE KNOWS YOU CAN’T DO SHIT ABOUT IT. So what do parents do when they can’t discipline their kid? They give in to demands, distract them with toys or candy (exacerbating the behavior) or ignore the kid to focus on whatever brought them out in the first place.
And it’s all your fault.
Obligation
Aug 4th
ob⋅li⋅ga⋅tion
–noun
1. something by which a person is bound or obliged to do certain things, and which arises out of a sense of duty or results from custom, law, etc.
2. something that is done or is to be done for such reasons:
to fulfill one’s obligations.
3. a binding promise, contract, sense of duty, etc.
4. the act of binding or obliging oneself by a promise, contract, etc.
I’ve been cataloging and making decisions about my own obligations lately. I’m obligated to pay my bills. I’m obligated to make sure my kids are set up in the world, but to what degree? I’m obligated to continue podcast editing, which I actually like doing. I’m obligated to maintain a connection with my mother due to a (not deathbed per se as she wasn’t actually near death just succumbing to Alzheimer’s) promise to my grandmother.
Mom called last night and bitched and moaned about some woman she knows. The woman for all intents and purposes is going senile. I mean, bringing your pillow and blanket to the casino and wearing a bra on your head… these are obvious signs, right? Anyway, Mom feels obligated to entertain the woman’s fantasies, to answer the phone the 437 times a day she calls, to make sure she eats, etc. Why? Because no one else will? How is that your obligation? And once you take it on, does that let everyone else off the hook? Isn’t it your own damned fault for taking on people you don’t have to, so quitcherbitchin. Mom tends to do that, take on needy people and then bitch the whole time. Martyr much?
What obligations should we choose to take on? How many obligations have you taken on in your life that turn into burdens? I know the whole care for your fellow man thing, but when you don’t get anything but misery out of it isn’t it time to let it go?
I’m obligated to pay my bills, but I get something out of that. I’m obligated to raise the children I chose to have, but (and this is what I struggle with) when is that day-to-day obligation over?
This process of finding ME is taking a long time. Shedding obligations is a major part of it and I’m finding it really hard to dump the last few.
